In the discussion from Day 1 of that journey, several people talked about practicing the foundational practices of revolutionary love so that we have something in else our toolkit to pull out when we are in a moment where we feel attacked and triggered (moments of “fierce entanglement” one speaker called it), instead of the seemingly instinctual tool of defense or counterattack. For me, giving up my own attack thoughts is part of that foundational practice because the Course teaches me (and I’ve come to know) that my own attack thoughts create the whole set up where I see a world of people who attack me or others. And it’s not just “my” thoughts in my physical head. It’s those thoughts of mine that are thought by the brain in your head or in that “stranger’s” head, because you are all me, right? All a part of me that I don’t yet know (although probably on some level I do know you well enough; I’m just not ready to accept those parts of me yet). It’s all just me, the One, out there having a different experience. Some of you are me having an experience where other parts of me feel justified in attacking you/us. Some of you are having an expererience where I or others parts of us feel called to defend . . . . And on and on it goes as we collectively create this world we see.
So, I am practicing seeing the oneness. I am practicing seeing no stranger, and I practicing (and failing pretty regularly) at seeing only love and calls for love–calls that I at least want to want to answer, mostly. I still “see” some separation. I haven’t quite figured out the technique of Jedi mind control or maybe Vulcan mind-meld so that all of the brains thinking my/our thoughts sees that oneness. But this part of me/us is practicing letting go of attack thoughts and seeing the world differently. And wouldn’t you know it–when I do that, I do escape the world I saw as angry, miserable, [you fill in the blank], and I see glimpses of a world of wonder.
]]>If you’re in the USA and also doing the lessons this year, starting with Lesson 1, then perhaps you too have been struck with how useful (or ironic maybe) the lessons have shown up during the events of this year in the 3D realm. New Year’s Day reminds me that nothing that I see means anything. Now, I typically prepare a traditional southern (US) New Year’s meal. Greens, peas, pork/ham, cornbread, and I throw in mashed potatoes because they are delicious, and added turkey this year for those who don’t eat pork. I practiced recognizing the inherent meaningless of those things individually and of the rituals themselves in and of themselves. The connection that I felt with those who gathered for the meal, though, felt like love. That love felt Real while the practice helped me not to attach meaning to things that might have irritated me otherwise.
I rocked along with Lessons 2-4, expanding the concepts to my thoughts, and to Lesson 5, recognizing I am never upset for the reason I think. This lesson came on the day I received a message from one of my siblings that my mother, 90 years old with dementia, had forgotten something on the stove and not noticed the smoke, etc. My sister-in-law had prevented a house fire, but we were all upset and worried and reactivated around trying to get my mother to come live with me. I felt upset, and honestly, it seemed justified–I wanted my mother to be safe, and I wanted the relief of having her close to help care for her. But the lesson reminded me I was not upset for the reason I thought. Hmm. Then why AM I upset?
Lesson 6 added that I was upset because I saw something that was not there. While I was still mulling this over in connection with my mother’s situation, gosh, January 6 offered a whole of more opportunities to be upset about seeing things that seemed to be there but were not. I watched the news and saw crowds (angry mob) pushing into the Capitol with legislators being hustled into safe areas. I saw clips of policemen who seem to be opening barricades to let the “mob” in and taking selfies with intruders in the Capitol. I heard reports of a woman having been shot, and a policeman having been killed. So many images; so many stories. I was upset, and I was profoundly sad. I was also certainly judging and seeing a whole lot of “past” and a whole lot of fear. If sinlessness was there, I was not immediately seeing it in the moment. The lesson says I was upset because I saw something that was not there. Yet, these events were quite real in the 3D world, and they relate to very real “systemic” issues in this 3D “world” that we have created together.
When I first encountered the idea of the disappearance of the universe in ACIM, I felt a bit ambivalent. Today, I am no longer on the fence. I long for our full awakening. I have quit secretly believing that my own internal awakening is enough. If indeed we are “one” world, then we are truly all in this together because we are all this together. In the moment as live feed streamed across my screen of events at the Capitol, I could not see it, but I am trying to re-see those events and see the perfection and sinlessness underneath the images my eyes light on and to recognize that whatever does not feel like love to me is just a call for love and forgiveness from me. A tall order. But these times we live in–between COVID (my son tested positive two days ago), political turmoil, systemic, endemic racism, elitism, injustice, and the other thousand faces of fear–show me quite vividly that I want the peace of God more than anything for me, for this “world.”
That does not mean that I do nothing (else) in this 3D existence but hope for peace. With guidance and love, I will show up for my mother and help figure out the best way forward for her. With guidance, love and a peaceful heart (please, God), I am called to connect with those that I do not agree with and to both envision and help create a different experience. There just has to be a better way than what we have all collectively created in the present. So, I continue doing these lessons and applying them practically as best I can. Lesson by lesson, I see more of where my meaningless thoughts are contributing to this meaningless world.
Today, I am reminded that I have no neutral thoughts. Disciplining my mind is absolutely critical when I own that every thought that I have has creative power. If every thought creates form on some level, then gosh, I am responsible for each and every one of them, right? But there is so much hope in that too. Wow, every single thought has power. Being “mindful” of my thoughts, curbing those that are harmful and actively thinking thoughts of love, of compassion of kindness helps create a different world. It is part of another way. Onward then. Tomorrow, Lesson 17.
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